A Troll with Mean Streak

I work with a Troll.

No joke. A Troll. My manager and several of my co-workers all confirm this belief and will stand behind me in this assertion.

I work in the purchasing office for a University here in Denver, CO. One of our AP (Accounts Payable) techs would win an award for "Battiest Co-worker Imaginable" - if such a thing existed. I could hand out many awards to several co-workers. However, this lady takes the cake. I have yet to meet someone who works with someone that even comes close to the bizarre ways of The Troll.

So you get a picture: this lady is about 5'1''. A boxy lady with glasses, a rather large mole on her chin, and a cackle that would rival the best witch cackles you've ever heard. I'm tempted to put a link to her picture - but that wouldn't be nice would it? I have realized that she never washes her hands after using the rest room. This knowledge helped explain why at my first company potluck everyone seemed to rush to the front of the line - pushing in front of The Troll. No one dares touch anything after she's gotten her poop-hands all over the utensils. Wish they would have told me before I ended up at the back of the line.

The Situation:

My cubicle is situated right next to a man lovingly referred to as TNT. He is a good natured man in his 40s with black and purple hair, a vegan diet, and a knack for creating nicknames for everyone worth note. The Troll ("PK" to him) has for some reason decided to unleash on him.

Last Friday she went to him asking for him to help her with something. When I see her I turn down my music so I can listen to the scene as it unfolds. That particular day she chose to tell TNT that she wanted to throw acid on him.... Insert her maniacal cackle here.

After much though as to how to respond to this he decided to go to the source. Talk to the Troll and tell her that this isn't acceptable humor to him. TNT walks over to her cubicle (thankfully on the far side of the office) and tells her that though he's all for humor and joking in the workplace - it makes him uncomfortable to be threatened with acid. One would think that she would apologize citing humor. Nope - not the Troll. Her response to him included correcting him saying that she never said she was going to simply throw acid on him. She wanted to make sure he realized that she wanted to "Throw acid all over your face and melt it off." She then growled (yes, growled) at him and walked away.

Who does that? I have a good feeling that more Troll stories will be haunting this blog. Some things just need to be written about for the amusement of the masses. If nothing else - enjoy the Schadenfreuden feeling you get knowing that this is not YOUR co-worker.